Laos: Money Trouble

"Money, the root of all evil...but the cure for all sadness." -Mike Gill

LAOS: MONEY TROUBLE

Well I've arrived safe and well in Laos, with a bank account full of money - but no money in cash, and no way to access it.

The ticket I bought to get to Laos from Cambodia ended up costing more and more. As I left Cambodia I checked and double checked that the ticket included all necessary charges. I also checked that there were ATMs where I was going.

Of course the travel agent turned out to be lying. As I left the country, I had to pay a departure tax, and an exit tax (How are these different?), and when I arrived I had to pay an arrival tax and pay for a Visa. I was told several times that the cost of the Visa was included in the ticket. All lies. I was basically crying as I got into the country at the cost of it all - one weeks budget on one bloody journey.

And of course, despite repeated assurances to the contrary there are no ATMs here at all. Its like being in a 3rd world country. Oh, no wait a minute.

I have to say I'm pretty angry about the whole thing. I've spent eight hours going round every bank in this city (the second largest in the country, and a UN World Heritage site) and apparently no one can help me.
I know for a fact that money can be transferred in the capital, and as I have here my passport and card, I said that even if the banks here won't accept my card, then couldn't they just fax a copy of my passport and card number, along with confirmation that I match the photo, and the card matches my passport, and transfer the money that way? Apparently not. And I really have tried at every bank, asking to speak to the manager and generally creating a bit of a scene.

I kept stressing that there must be some way to get money to me, and I wasn't just going to live here and die of starvation out here, and that money would come eventually so they might as well try to help me.

The most annoying thing is that absolutely no one gives a shit about it out here. I keep saying that if they help me transfer money then I'm willing to give them some money as a thank you.
The whole thing is ridiculous. Take the one time I tried to ring a bank in the capital that would accept my card. I was told to do this at the bank, although they don't know the number. "Its not possible. We don't know the number" they told me, immediately after telling me to ring them.

"Well, surely you must be able to find out the number, somehow", I pleaded. I just couldn't believe that no equivalent to Directory Inquiries or the Yellow Pages existed. Apparently not. Although the National Telecom Information building is only half an hour down the road, so I hopped on a motorbike and went there. It turns out, (after a long wait), that they can only tell you certain phone numbers - ie those of Laos owned businesses. A business in Laos that is owned by a Thai businessman - such as the Thai bank in the Laos capital - they won't have the number for. Even though it is in Laos, and even though they are Laos National Telecom Information organization. Its just an absolute joke.

* * *

Eventually of course I managed to get some money from the bank - after two days of trying. The bank employees really don't have a clue about anything. They gave me a "Money to be received" form, in which I put all the details in. All well and good, except that half of the form is for me, and the other half says quite clearly "For Bank staff only". And it was written in both English and Laos. One of the sections in the "For Bank staff only" said: "Could the customer answer the security question correctly? Yes/No". I pointed out to the staff that this is clearly for them to ask me, not the other way round. I mean I'm hardly going to tick the No box and say that I'm not the person I claim to be. I

In Laos of course, it would be too complicated to have a currency that actually makes any sense. The largest note you can get is worth less than seventy pence in English money, and they don't have many of these "large notes". So most of the notes they gave me were the equivalent of 7p, or 0.7p, so I basically ended up with huge bundles of cash. So big in fact that I literally couldn't carry them in my hands, and I had to ask for a bag.

So they gave me a black bin liner.

It really is a bit silly. I mean, even taking into account the fact that things are cheaper here than in England, having such small notes just doesn't make any sense, and you see people wandering round with huge bundles of cash, paying thousand upon thousand of Kip to buy something really trivial like a banana.

Into the forgotten kingdom

"Please do not bring explosives into the temple"
Sign outside temple at Angor Wat

INTO THE FORGOTTEN KINGDOM
Angkor Wat is stunning, and any description makes you overdose on superlatives. It's difficult to get a sense of scale of this complex of temples. Its bigger than the Vatican, bigger than the Taj Mahal - in fact it is the worlds largest religious building. I started by walking round, then, realising my mistake, hired a bicycle
as otherwise it would have taken weeks to get around. There are huge stone sculptures of heads and faces.

The flora and fauna are pretty incredible as well. There is everything from elephants and monkeys down to butterflies - including, somewhat bizarrely, a herd of geese. Trees puncture through some of the stonework, and vines droop down. Bald Buddhist monks in bright orange flowing robes stroll around. It really is an
awe-inspiring sight, and what with the heat and humidity the whole experience is overwhelming.


* * * *

The other side to this area of Cambodia is the landmines. This really is a genuine problem decades after the last armed conflict here. Even now, landmines kill between 800 and 2000 people a year, just in this one tiny country. How often is that on the news? It really just isn't right that kids should be wandering round without arms or legs because of actions taken a quarter of a century ago.

I have also visited the killing fields, although I don't really want to dwell on the subject. I'm still slightly shocked that Pol Pot lived his entire life a free man, and died of old age in 1998. His conduct was clearly criminal, and he has rightly been described as the architect of one of the worst events of the 20th century. (It is perhaps worth bearing in mind however, that the US military killed at least twice as many people as Pol Pot did in SE Asia). It wasn't until the Vietnamese
invaded that the Khmer Rouge's tyranny was brought to an end.

Anyway, I'm headed off to Laos. Finally, one place that managed to escape the ravages of the Vietnam War. Sort of.